I Swear, The Plan Looked Foolproof on Paper

January 13th, 2009

Filed under: Comics, Medicine

jolsen

Sorry Jimmy, but I don’t think you’re going to survive this adventure.

Try this yourself. Only — unlike Jimmy — do not do it underwater.
• Next time you’re at a restaurant, help yourself to a handful of straws.
• Once you’re home, lie back on the bed, seal your mouth around a straw, and start breathing in and out through it. No cheating — just use the straw. How long until you start to feel lightheaded or are gasping for air?
• Tape two of the straws securely together end-to-end and try it again. It’s even harder, isn’t it?
• Now use three straws taped together end to end. How long did you last this time? Still think Jimmy could have survived?

The straw Jimmy is using is simply too long and too narrow to work. That means that there is too much flow resistance to get the old air out and fresh air in. Instead, he’ll end up breathing in the same oxygen-deprived air he just breathed out, and within a minute or two he’ll pass out. Since he’s underwater, that’s likely to prove fatal.

There’s a reason snorkels (and endotracheal tubes) are wide and relatively short.

scene from Superman’s Pal Jimmy Olsen Special #1, by James Robinson and a whole bunch of artists.

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9 Responses to “ I Swear, The Plan Looked Foolproof on Paper ”

  1. Dr Archeville
    January 14th, 2009 at 8:38 am

    That, and there’s some guy stepping on him. That can’t be good.

  2. Krystian Majewski
    January 14th, 2009 at 10:16 am

    Also, because his Lungs are filled with Air, he would be lighter than water and wouldn’t be able to lie on the bottom unless he had some extra Weights on him.

  3. Conor E
    January 14th, 2009 at 10:50 am

    When did Jesus become a costumed assassin, and why is He hunting Jimmy?

  4. Dr. Gagan
    January 14th, 2009 at 11:46 am

    Why not use a supplementary oxygen device and exhale through the straw.

  5. H
    January 14th, 2009 at 12:00 pm

    This entry satisfies my goal of learning something new every day.

    Thanks Scott!

    Still, I think that the greatness of Jimmy Olsen can’t be expected to be limited by physical restraints of ordinary non-best pals of Superman.

  6. Travis
    January 14th, 2009 at 8:32 pm

    They at least could have given him two straw/tubes. That way they could have said he was using one for inhale and one for exhale.

  7. guayec
    January 15th, 2009 at 7:15 am

    Now I can’t stop thinking of medieval japanese swamps filled with dozens of drowned ninjas. Yeah, I know it was probably not like that, but in the animes this is a widely used technique.

    Well, this post has probably saved my life. Thanks!

  8. Bret
    January 15th, 2009 at 6:04 pm

    Remember, Jimmy needs less oxygen than most folks, as his brain requires no maintenance and, in fact, has not been used in decades.

  9. BobF
    February 14th, 2009 at 10:48 am

    Keep in mind as well that a lone white straw that long also draws very very little attention from an individual who is trained enough to walk on a pond.

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