Reduce Within 10 Days or Money Refunded!

Oxidizes excess fat!
Click on the image for the full ad

Quack diet aids are nothing new — here’s an ad from Captain America Comics #69 (November 1948) touting “Protam.”

I sure would love to know what, if anything, Protam was. The ad is little help — it tells us what Protam isn’t more than what it is: No drugs. No starvation. No exercise. No massage. Nothing to wear (does this mean they’re naked?). Not a drug. Not a laxative. Not a Thyroid.

The ad throws in a bunch of interesting claims and statements:
Protam!It works “even if burdened with Fat for many years (illness excepted).”
Protam!Drastically cuts down fat producing calories (But what about calorie producing fat?)
Protam!Lose Ugly Fat Economically, Simply, Pleasantly.
Protam!Protam Plan Good for Ladies, Too. (But not so good for verbs, apparently).
Protam!Sorry, no Canadian orders. (Damn Canada and their truth in advertising laws! OK, that’s just a guess…)

Protam wasn’t just advertised in comics, but in magazines such as Popular Science as well.

6 Responses to “ Reduce Within 10 Days or Money Refunded! ”

  1. Protam is still on the market in some countries. The modern Protam is a vegetable-based protein supplement that contains the eight required amino acids. it’s normally used as an additive to vegan processed foods.

  2. “Protam Plan Good for Ladies, Too. (But not so good for verbs, apparently).”

    Sounds like any number of English language ads in Hong Kong. Chinese sometime no good at translation la. Grammar very diffrent.

  3. Wow. It’s got protein and amino acids. It must be extra effective.

    What the hell is it, powdered Bob Atkins?

  4. I’ve always loved “Lose up to…”.

    It can always be restated as “No more than….if any”

  5. Didn’t they put tapeworms in pill form back then and sell them as diet aids?

    –Rawr

  6. I wonder how that would work – as I understand it, tapeworms have a fairly complex life cycle (egg – larval form in first host – adult form in second host – eggs), so in order to get the malnutrition-inducing adult form one would need to consume the larval form, which I wouldn’t think would survive terribly long outside the host.
    The nasty thing about tapeworms is that, often, the adult form is relatively benign, whereas the larval form can kill you. There is a particularly nasty one called Echinococcus multilocularis that pretty much acts like metastatic liver cancer. Treatment is pretty much lifelong chemotherapy or liver transplant, apparently.
    What’s fascinating is that, with some tapeworms, one egg can result in thousands of larvae. Flukes, too.

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