Polite Dissent

It’s time to take a look at the various searches that brought people to Polite Dissent in the month of February. The bizarre things that people search for never cease to amaze me — and it’s even more amazing that these searches somehow brought them here.

the ifle tower in paris – I’m not surprised that Eiffel was spelled wrong (I had to look it up myself), but that so many people spelled it wrong. Was it the same person searching multiple times? Or many people without a dictionary?

busty women – Well, comic books are certainly full of them. Which is strange when you really think about it. Professional athletes are all “non-busty” and one would think super-heroines would follow the same body patterns. The way most of them are drawn, they’ll put out an eye before they ever apprehend a crook.

kitty pryde agent of shield review – It’s bad.

wkrp dvd - Tom explains it better than I ever could.

rattlesnake bite symptoms – First, there’s a very angry legless reptile attached to your leg. Then there’s the bite marks, swelling, pain. Oh just go here to look it up!

superman leprosy x – I actually haven’t covered this topic yet, but don’t worry, it’s coming up. Look for Virus X and Kryprtonian Leprosy during my All Superman Week (which should be the last week of March).

best neurosurgeon in the world – Hush, of course.

echinacea enzite – “What are ‘alternative medicine treatments’ that don’t work, Alex.”

gregory house medical ethics – I don’t think he has any.

gor parody – Is this what you are looking for?

time travel conundrum – For short stories, I prefer Heinlein’s “By His Bootstraps”. For novels, The Anubis Gates /strong>, by Tim Powers, is best.

acronym for brat – Bananas, Rice, Apples/applesauce, Toast. It’s a good diet to help recover from diarrhea.

worst science fiction movie – I vote for Robinson Crusoe on Mars

bruce wayne hairdresser – One of the more underappreciated Elseworlds specials. I particularly like the scene in the beginning when a wig flies in through the window of Wayne Manor and Bruce announces, “I shall become…a hairdresser.”

kim possible voice talent senior junior – Señor Senior Junior is voiced by Nestor Carbonell. He also played the father on this week’s episode of House.

249 – Why is somebody just searching for a number. There have got to be hundreds of results.

dana delaney naked – I recommend renting Exit to Eden. It’s a horrible movie from a horrible Anne Rice book, but at least it’s got Dana Delaney naked.

spaghetti and meatballs skin disease – Tinea versicolor. “Spaghetti and Meatballs” is how skin scrapings from a person with TV looks under a microscope.

(And of course, there were the usual searches for Dave Trampier, Wormy, Yamara, Delusional Parasitosis, Pica, Bwana Beast and Zatanna porn.)