Comments on: The Single Most Mind-Numbingly Confusing Medically-Related Panel in Comic Book History

By: Bob

Bob — Wed, 19 May 2010 21:58:46 +0000

For what it’s worth, Bizarro #1 was not immune to kryptonite. He was immune to GREEN kryptonite. BLUE kryptonite had the same effect on him that green K did on Supes. Blue K is produced by running green K through the same crazy duplication machine that made Bizarro out of Superman in the first place (and as far as I can remember, blue K didn’t affect Supes at all).

By: Chris Arndt

Chris Arndt — Fri, 29 Apr 2005 19:31:10 +0000

Let’s see… all I’ve come to point out is that the only Bizarro which ever made a lick of sense, the Pre-Crisis Bizarro #1 was not only not alive, but he was immune to Kryptonite. He was genetically not Superman and quite likely not quite biological.

The Bizarro we’re dealing with, born not from a ‘Bizarro Ray’ but from 5D-lifeform-empowered ‘Emperor Joker’ is just…. wierd. I hate him.

By: John Nowak

John Nowak — Fri, 29 Apr 2005 06:34:14 +0000

Yeah, that’s the problem when you have a character like Bizarro who is basically defined by “he applies a boolean ‘NOT’ to everything.” Eventually the negatives cancel out and you’re left with whatever you started with.

By: Aine

Aine — Thu, 28 Apr 2005 12:31:57 +0000

The logic of this conversation has ceased to be circular and is now approaching a more bizarre four dimensional shape.

By: John Nowak

John Nowak — Thu, 28 Apr 2005 06:46:27 +0000

But then again, if the anti-bodies actually make Bizarro sick, that means they’ll make him get better, so I suppose it all evens out.

By: Jon H

Jon H — Thu, 28 Apr 2005 01:10:13 +0000

So does that mean that Bizarro’s body produces worn-out red blood cells, which circulate around his body, until they become new, at which point they’re absorbed by the marrow?

By: dwnin

dwnin — Wed, 27 Apr 2005 17:50:10 +0000

“Does Bizarro say ‘Bad-Bye’? Does he live underwater? Is he black?”

By: David Oakes

David Oakes — Wed, 27 Apr 2005 16:59:10 +0000

Bizi-bodies hate Bizarro viruseses. Make them strong, feed them Bizarro Chicken Soup. But they afraid of plain-old normal virii. Eat them instead.

Bizarro no have blood type. Bizarro Pal Superman have blood type K. Bizarro veins filled with chunky peanut butter. Yuck!

[Editor's Note - Due to exposure to Earth's yellow sun, Xarxas - named for Xarx-as, the "Louis Pasteur of Krypton"* - has gained the super-power to infect even the inverse metabolism of a creature like Bizzaro. You see, all proteins have a three dimensional configuration due to hydrogen bonds and sulfer bridges. This allows for two forms of every protein. Superman is of course composed of the Good, or "Dexter" forms, while Bizarro is composed entirely of the Evil or "Sinister" type.]

(Yes, in Real Life I know my biochemistry, and no, it isn’t that simple. C’mon, you don’t see continuity cops jumping on my chunky peanut butter retcon. Ok, someone probably will…)

(In all seriousness, there is probably a good case for Bizarro being a plant. I am suprised that neither Moore nor Vietch ever explored that gag during their Swamp Thing runs. Of course, post-Byrne, Bizarro is even more of a mineral. He probably runs on pizo-electricity, and generates sunlight in Superman’s presence. Nothing gets the creative juices flowing like trying to make sense of comic book science!)

By: Aine

Aine — Wed, 27 Apr 2005 16:28:15 +0000

So whilst the virus would have given superman your usual flu like symptoms such as fever, less energy and physical weakness, Bizarro’s syptoms were more in line with an adrenaline rush (Stronger! Faster! Having a heart attach?). Y’know, even the dog is distressed by the stupidity of this.

By: Scott

Scott — Wed, 27 Apr 2005 14:59:17 +0000

Jer,

The virus “affected” Bizarro by making him stronger instead of weaker (though apparently it would still have killed him…)

The girl half off-panel is Cir-El the Supergirl “manufactured” by the Futuresmiths. She was around mainly 1 year or so.