Polite Dissent

Fantastic Four #73 (Third Series) 5th Wheel, part 2
Mark Waid, writer
Casey Jones, artist

In Fantastic Four #73 (or #502, depending on which numbering system you use), Reed Richards and Johnny Storm traveled back in time and cut a sample of hair from Victor von Doom’s head. Reed then uses the DNA from this sample to make armbands protective against Castle Doom’s defenses in Fantastic Four #74.

The problem is that hair is composed of protein molecules and not cells and has no DNA. Hair samples can have DNA if they are pulled out or fall out, as most of these hairs still have the follicle attached, which does have cells and DNA.

However, Reed cut a hunk of Doom’s hair off with a laser – leaving no follicles, and no DNA. (Now maybe Doom had bad dandruff, so some scalp flakes were in the hair sample allowing Reed to get the DNA he needed. This bad dandruff would have led to awkward teenage years and rejection after rejection from the girls. His self-esteem plummeting, Doom had no choice but to flee Latveria for schooling in the U.S. Furthermore, the teen angst he experienced due to his bad dandruff could have been the spark that led him to seek revenge and world domination. And to think that Dr. Doom’s megalomania could have been cured by a bottle of Selsun Blue…)

As Dr. Midnight’s associate Nite-Lite gives Hourman and Wildcat a tour of the Cross Medical Clinic, he explains why they have a room full of high-tech equipment:

Last year, a self-aware strain of Camel Pox callin’ itself the seeing plague blinded three-hundred people in Portsmouth…Doc says we gotta be prepared with more than a pair of eye scissors and aspirin.

Camel Pox is a real disease caused by a virus closely related to Smallpox. It causes fever and mouth sores on camels. There have been no cases of Camel Pox infecting humans. There is some concern that it is close enough to Smallpox to have the potential to infect humans if it mutates (or is mutated) the wrong way.

A cluster of infection from a mutated Camel Pox virus is well within the realm of possibility. I would expect symptoms similar to its effects in camels, but with a self-aware virus, I guess anything is possible. (But why does a virus calling itself “The Seeing Plague” cause blindness?)